Hey Brew,
This week, Cape Town said, "What if we took the usual chaos... and gave it a BMX, a whisky chaser, and an exploding air fryer?"
Grab a glass, this one’s a ride:
Limpopo teens cycle 1,700km to shout down gender-based violence
R500 million in Sea Point sales while locals cry into their sewage pipes
Plus: a whisky tasting that pairs Macallan with kudu (not kidding)
And the planets literally formed a smile over the city. Cape Town, you're extra.
Let’s get into it:
🗞️ The Headlines
🚴♂️ BMX Trio Rides for Justice
Three Limpopo legends—Mahlakwane Gauta, Karabo Mokoo, and Ndo Maxwell—cycled over 1,700 kilometers to raise awareness about gender-based violence, arriving in Cape Town like champions of the people.
Their story isn’t just about endurance—it’s a powerful statement of youth-led activism.
✔️ Why It Matters:
They're continuing the campaign locally, linking up with the Langa Cycling Club and even the Archbishop himself.
They want to donate 1,741 bikes—one for every kilometer of their ride—to under-resourced communities.
✔️ Best Quote: "This journey has always been about more than just reaching Cape Town."
✨ Mont Reve Makes Bank: R500M in 24hrs
Sea Point just got a serious flex. Mont Reve, the area’s newest luxury development, sold 89 of 94 apartments in a single day—racking up over R500 million in 24 hours. One penthouse alone went for R23.9M, presumably with a free ego boost.
✔️ Who’s Buying?
82% of the buyers are South Africans. The other 18%? Probably Londoners who realized they could live oceanfront here for the price of a shoebox back home.
✔️ Why Locals Are Losing It:
More traffic. More pressure on aging sewer lines. And fewer signs of the laid-back, old-school Sea Point they loved. It’s luxury overload with a side of infrastructure strain.
🏣 R3.2 Billion to Unclench Your Commute
Cape Town has officially hit the global leaderboard of traffic nightmares—ranked 9th most congested in the world.
Enter: a R3.2 billion provincial plan to unstick our roads, revive rail, and rethink mobility like it’s not 1997.
✔️ The Fix List:
The Khayelitsha and Mitchells Plain train lines are being revived after 5 years of silence.
More electric buses, upgraded taxi support, and rural transport projects are coming.
✔️ Real Talk: Cape Town drivers lose nearly 4 days a year to traffic. That’s four more days we could be spending at Mojo Market or napping.
🔥 Air Fryers: From Hot Trend to Fire Hazard
More than 3 million air fryers recalled globally after they started literally exploding. Cosori, Magic Chef, Insignia—the gang's all here.
✔️ Symptoms Include:
Flames
Melting plastic
Appliances blowing up before you even hit "start"
✔️ What Now? Unplug. Check recall lists. Cook like it's 2005.
💎 Hidden Gems & Local Legends
🌌 The Celestial Smiley Face
Okay, this is the universe’s version of sending a “You got this” text. On April 25, just before sunrise, Cape Town’s sky turned into an actual emoji.
✔️ What’s Happening: Venus (super bright), Saturn (faint but vibing), and the Moon (a perfect crescent) lined up in the east to form a grin—like the solar system’s winking at us. It’s called a triple conjunction, and it doesn’t happen often.
✔️ How to See It: Set that alarm for 5:30 AM. Face the eastern horizon. Venus will be your north star (except not actually). The Moon smiles underneath, and Saturn chills to the side. You don’t need a telescope—but a hot cup of coffee helps.
✔️ Extra Juice: Venus is at “greatest brilliancy” right now, meaning she’s shining her hardest. It’s basically the Beyoncé of planets this week.
🍷 Whisky + Kudu at Mint, Taj Hotel
A four-course fire-powered feast with whisky pairings that’ll leave your tastebuds tipsy.
✔️ The Lineup:
Macallan 12 with blue cheese-stuffed dates
Macallan 15 with smoked kudu + rooibos gel
Macallan 18 on beef short rib
Macallan Classic Cut in the dessert (ganache for the win)
When: Friday, April 25 | 18:30 arrival
Cost: R495 pp (book fast, limited seats)
🥘 Zanne’s Fare: SA Nostalgia on a Plate
Hidden in the courtyard of Heritage Square, Zanne’s Fare dishes up the kind of warm, comfort-laced South African food that makes you want to call your gran.
Think bobotie, chicken curry, and roosterkoek sandwiches stuffed with snoek pâté and hanepoot jam.
✔️ Why we love it:
Dishes are served with poppadoms, mango salsa, and crispy onions—because sides are a love language.
A cozy spot for coffee, cake, or a full-on nostalgia feast in the heart of the city.
🥐 Coco Safar (Sea Point)
This café, bakery and patisserie levels up the dessert game in Sea Point with a lush lineup of macarons, handcrafted chocolate, and their famous couture patisserie.
Think old-world elegance meets contemporary Cape Town cool.
✔️ Why it’s special:
They roast, brew, and bake daily using only all-natural, additive-free ingredients
Signature creations include saffron croissants, botanical drinks, and luxe espresso pairings
Fully halaal-friendly, with options ranging from burgers to vegetarian and health-forward picks
📣 Wanna Put Your Biz in Front of Thousands?
Sponsor Cape Brew and get:
📬 Featured in the next newsletter (we’ll hype you up properly)
🎯 Added to our Daily Magic Button listings (the hot list people actually click)
🎧 Live Music & Entertainment
Friday, April 25
🎷 Strictly Soul at Youngblood
A candlelit groove fest blending soul classics, rooftop vibes, and sexy ambiance.
🎭 Improguise: The Good, The Bad, and The Scriptless
Cape Town’s improv legends go full cowboy with unscripted chaos at The Galloway.
🍷 ABBA Tribute @ Simon’s
Dress loud, sing louder — it’s Swedish sparkle in the vineyards.
Saturday, April 26
🐣 Mini Flight Cocktail Festival
Sip, swirl, repeat — 20+ cocktails, rooftop beats, and perfect Insta backdrops at Cause & Effect Rondebosch.
🖼️ G... is for Graffiti Workshop
Learn the art of rebellion with a spray can and a purpose. All materials included.
🎶 Bright Blue Live @ Brass Bell
SA rock royalty by the sea. Nostalgia, waves, and a killer view.
Sunday, April 27
🎨 Paint & Sip (RnB Edition)
Paint your masterpiece to RnB classics. Drinks flow. So do the vibes.
🎭 A Characterised Performance of The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran
Poetry meets performance in this rare, moving interpretation of a literary classic.
🎂 Mojo Market’s 8th Birthday Bash
Free entry. Live music. Birthday chaos. Just bring the crew.
Monday, April 28
🎶 Musical Mondays @ The Outlore Base
Live performances to cure the Monday blues — expect unexpected sets, open-mic energy, and local talent bringing serious vibes.
☕ Home Barista Crash Course
Perfect your espresso game. Because life’s too short for bad coffee.
🎭 Growing a Plant Named HOPE @ Youngblood-Africa
A soulful, multimedia performance exploring resilience, growth, and healing — part installation, part experience.
Tuesday, April 29
🎤 Open Mic Poetry @ Selective Live
Raw, unfiltered, local wordsmiths take the mic. Expect chills.
🧠 Sacred Steps @ The Commons
A mindful gathering blending movement, connection, and inner peace.
☕ Networking Coffee Meetup @ Truth Coffee
Pitch, sip, connect — no pressure, just caffeine-fueled business conversation.
Wednesday, April 30
🎸 Morgan Visser Live @ Café Roux
Soulful, gritty, goosebumps guaranteed. Midweek magic by the seaside.
🎨 Easter Cookie & Cupcake Decorating @ Willowbridge
Unleash your inner Bake-Off star. Icing, sprinkles, and sugar highs guaranteed.
🎷 Celebrate International Jazz Day
Camissa Knights bring the heat to Constantia. Horns, harmonies, and heritage.
Thursday, May 1
🖼️ The Art of Our Mother – First Thursdays Walking Tour
Explore Cape Town’s CBD through public art tributes to feminine energy and ancestral stories. A soulful way to soak in creativity and culture.
🎲 Comic Con Cape Town – Dungeons & Dragons: Quick Encounter
D20s, dragons, and dungeon chaos — perfect for first-timers or die-hard nerds. Held at CTICC 2.
🎷 Gin & Jazz @ Clay Café Maggie’s Farm
A slow-sipping midday mashup of smooth jazz and local gin in a farm setting. Bougie meets barefoot.
📸 Picture of the Week
Simon's Town, you dramatic little show-off.
This pic has seagull jealousy written all over it.
Got a pic that captures Cape Town’s wild spirit?
Tag it on Instagram or Reddit with #CPTBrew for a chance to be featured in next week’s edition.
Alright brew, that’s it for this week. You made it to the end, which means one of three things: you're wildly curious, your coffee hasn't kicked in, or you're procrastinating something way more important (same).
As always, Cape Town is doing the absolute most—teens pedaling for change, developers selling skyline views, and Venus literally throwing us a wink from space.
Got a tip? A rant? A spontaneous jazz event you think we should know about? Hit reply.
Until next week, stay weird, stay warm, and keep your breakfast appliances flame-free.
~ CPT Brew
P.S. Share this with a friend. If they become famous, you can say you knew them when they still read newsletters.
